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Prepare the wok for steaming.
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In a bowl, mix the boiling water and the sugar, stirring to dissolve.
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Cool. Soak the Chinese dates in hot water for at least 30 minutes to soften. (You can also
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soften them quickly by placing them in a bowl with water and microwaving on high heat for
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30 seconds). Cut the dates in half and remove the pits.
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Place the glutinous rice flour in a large bowl. Make a well in the middle and stir in the sugar and water mixture. Add the milk and begin shaping the dough. Add 1 tablespoon of
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water to the dough at a time, until you have a smooth dough with a satiny texture. Incorporate 1/2 - 3/4 of the Chinese dates, nuts or other dried fruit as you are adding water and working with the dough.
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Grease a 7-inch square cake pan with vegetable oil or a non-stick cooking spray. Place the dough in the cake pan and spread it out to the edges. Decorate with the remaining
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dates, lightly pushing them into the dough. Sprinkle the sesame seeds on top.
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Steam the cake over medium-high to high heat for 45 minutes, or until the edges of the cake pull away from the pan. Remove the cake from the heat and cool.
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Use a knife to loosen the edges, then remove the cake. Wrap in wax paper and refrigerate overnight.
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To serve: Cut the cake into quarters, and then into thin slices 2 - 3 inches long and 1/4-inch wide. You can serve the cake as is, or reheat it in the microwave (the amount of time will depend on the size and power of your microwave - start with 10 seconds and then microwave an extra 5 seconds if needed) or re-steam it for 4 - 5 minutes.
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You can also pan-fry the cake, dipping the cake slices in an egg wash before frying. Use a small amount of oil so that the cake will not taste oily. Heat the oil on medium-high to high heat, then turn the heat down to medium and brown the cake slices briefly on both sides.
