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1. Heat oven to broil; arrange rack 6in from heating element. Ina small bowl, toss jalapenos with 1 tbl oil. Transfer jalapenos to a foil-lined baking sheet;broil, turning several times, until blackened, about 12 min. Transfer to bowl, cover with plastic wrap, and set aside to let steam for 15 min. Peel the jalapenos. Working with 1 jalapeno at a time cut a slit down the length of the pepper. Scoop out the seeds with a small spoon (handle carefully so they stay intact). Set aside.
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2. With a fork, vigorously mix together crab, cream cheese, cilantro, parsley, shallots, 1 1/2 tbl bread crumbs, lime juice, and yolk in a bowl. Stuff each jalapeno with 1 heaping tbl of filling; transfer to a plate and repeat with remaining jalapenos. Refrigerate for 30 min.
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3. Put remaining bread crumbs into a shallow dish. Put flour into another small dish. Whisk together milk and eggs in a bowl. Working with 1 jalapeno at a time, dredge jalapeno in flour, shaking off excess. Dip jalapeno in egg mixture, roll in bread crumbs, and transfer to a plate; set aside.
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4. Pour oil to depth of 2in into a 4qt saucepan over med-high heat until a deep-fry thermometer reads 325 degrees. Working in batches, add jalapenos and cook, turning occasionally, until golden brown, about 3 minutes. Drain on paper towels; sprinkle with salt.
